We spend a great deal of time thinking about the notion of love as a one-dimensional concept that involves emotional feelings of attachment for another person. In reality, it is so much more. Just as we are experiencing life in a multidimensional way, the exactness of love is most optimally experienced through this very same multidimensional conceptual manner. This ultimately means uncovering levels of thought and perception that lie beyond our current awareness. If we want to achieve the love that we desire at a more profound level, we are required to explore outside of what we think we know to get to the heart of the matter in its entirety. To do this finding of and engagement in deeper love we must start from the bottom. We have to awaken to levels of intimacy and connection that may at first glance appear to be uncomfortable but are required to advance and to evolve. We must identify the intrinsic and do the groundwork of establishing firm foundations created by its ideals. Then, we become equipped to embrace the totality of what it means to love deeply, as well as to have and to maintain an amazingly fulfilling love life with someone else.
In this life, a great deal of what we do is driven by our desire to love and to be loved. In some way shape or form, we all want love. It is a fundamental element of our happiness. As we grow so too does our desire for greater, and more meaningful connection. With this knowledge, we may conclude that a fulfilling love life is, therefore, an important part of holistic and balanced living. When we take the time to discover deeper aspects of this very pertinent life need we move closer to our truth, a life of greater meaning, pleasure, and personal value.
In honor of Love Month, I want to share a heartwarming love story to which the moral is, that we should not take love at any level for granted. Within the context of the story, the understanding is effectively conveyed that, to love is nothing, to be loved is something, but to be loved by the one you love is Everything. That in essence is what we are all after, a mirror reflection of the deepest love that you can find within yourself. When you are able to do this there is no depth of love that will evade your reach.
A Very Poor Man and His Wife
A very poor man lived with his wife.
One day, his wife, who had very long hair asked him to buy her a comb for her hair to grow well and to be well-groomed.
The man felt very sorry and said no.
He explained that he did not even have enough money to fix the strap of his watch he had just broken. She did not insist on her request.
The man went to work and passed by a watch shop, sold his damaged watch at a low price, and went to buy a comb for his wife.
He came home in the evening with the comb in his hand ready to give to his wife.
He was surprised when he saw his wife with a very short haircut.
She had sold her hair and was holding a new watchband.
Tears flowed simultaneously from their eyes, not for the futility of their actions, but for the reciprocity of their love.
— Adapted from the short Story
“The Gift of the Magi” by O. Henry
In the course of my own awakening and research on Source Love and balanced living, I uncovered 5 fundamental practices centered on the growth in awareness of love. They have helped me to have a deeper understanding of the multidimensionality, the many ways to experience what love means, and to have an amazingly fulfilling love life.
Apply These 5 Practices to Have an Amazingly Fulfilling Love Life
- Self-Love: The most important lesson that I have ever learned about love is that it comes from within. In order to experience love at its fullest potential, you have to love yourself first. What I have come to understand is that love is so multi-faceted and multidimensional, but here and now in its purest form it resides in you, so that regardless of whatever else is going on in the world, the experience of love resides in a safe place and can be applied to any circumstance. As long as you replenish and ensure its protection, it will always live there. Love for anything else first comes from within in order that you may experience it without. In tapping into this reservoir of self-love, the most important thing is to accept yourself fully. The only way to love and accept yourself is to know yourself. Only when you know, acknowledge, and unapologetically accept every single aspect of your being are you truly complete. I have learned that you have to be well with yourself in order to give, to receive from, or to be a part of any true love exchange that is outside of yourself. If you are not well with yourself, it does not matter how much you love someone else or how much they love you, your experience will be incomplete. There will always be a void, and what comes in between is always a struggle. You will be constantly looking for…you don’t even know what. You should also keep in mind that to be able to fully give love without depleting yourself, you have to start out whole, and that implies being full of self-love. Likewise, to be able to fully receive love, you must be whole so as not to deplete the giver and to receive the love as a gift, not as something that is needed to complete you. When you operate from a place of total self-love you are bound to have an amazingly fulfilling love life!
- Have Vision: To have a fulfilling love life you have to have a clear vision of what you want your love life experience to be. Having a vision of your love life makes it easy for you to be able to place yourself in the flow of exactly what the ideal love life looks and feels like to you. By holding this visual you begin to put out the right vibes in attracting the love life that you desire. If for example, your ultimate love life goal is to have an incredible love relationship that lasts a lifetime, a relationship vision will help you to be purposeful, manage your expectations, and to bring meaning to your experience. If you have had trouble getting to a satisfactory point in your love life, having a clear vision of your love life can help you to break patterns of falling for the same type of person or situation. In the same regard, it can help you to weed out what you are not looking for in the dating pool so that you are no longer wasting time with people or circumstances that will not serve your vision. Having a clear vision of your love life can help you in an existing relationship by providing you with the direction you need to get to the next level. Seeing your vision clearly helps you to identify and to know for certain exactly what you are going for and how you will get to it full speed ahead, towards an amazingly fulfilling love life!
- Be Present: Practice being more present to experience greater depth in love. To have an amazingly fulfilling love life you have to have the right energy. You have to show up for it; pour yourself completely into it. Your full presence in your love life requires you to learn how to always be cognizant of what is going on within its midsts, of what it needs, or what it could possibly do without. This means that you should pay attention to all aspects of it; being mindful of it physically, emotionally, and spiritually. You should know what hurts or stagnates it, as well as what uplifts and thrusts it forward. Be all in; Be amazing when it comes to your love life. By consistently bringing your full presence, you ensure balance and fulfillment for the love life you truly desire.
- Nurturing Spirit: Your love life requires your care and maintenance to really be all that you want it to be! To have an amazingly fulfilling love life you need to approach it with a nurturing spirit. This means that you come into it with the understanding that you will have to provide for its growth and expansion on a regular basis. Using your love life or relationship vision as your guide, become aware of exactly what it will take to keep your love life alive and thriving. The methods that you will use to sustain and grow your love life are entirely subjective to your preference and desired experience. This can include: Learning more about love relationships through different forms of research (think all 5 senses); introducing new experiences like travel or hobbies, new practices, new commitments, or honoring them through ceremony and celebrations. There are so many ways to nurture your love life to make it amazingly fulfilling.
- Golden Rule: If you want to have an amazingly fulfilling love life get into the practice of loving the way that you want to be loved. When you love the way that you want to be loved you set the stage for a response that is in like kind. Do the things for your partner or love interest that you would like done for you; treat them as you want to be treated, respect and honor them in the way that you would like them to respect and honor you, emphasize all of the things that are most important to you by demonstrating them consistently. When you follow this golden rule in your love life you create an example that reverberates back to you. You encourage and make it safe to act in a mutually acceptable manner towards yourself, moving you into what you deem as a fulfilling love life.
So much of what we do in this life is driven by our desire to love and to be loved. This reveals to us that finding deeper meaning and having a fulfilled love life is super important to our overall happiness. Like the story of A Very Poor Man and His Wife says, “To love is nothing, to be loved is something, but to be loved by the one you love is EVERYTHING”. This reflection is the ultimate confirmation that we are on the right path of walking into our truth. In order to get that, Self-Love, having a love life or relationship vision, being fully present, having a nurturing spirit, and loving the way that you want to be loved are essential practices to apply that lead to having everything you need in an amazingly fulfilling love life. When we learn to love as Source loves, there is none greater.